Wednesday, June 1, 2011

How a stuffed seahorse saved me ...

I owe a great deal of my sanity to the wonderful people at Fisher Price ™.  I realized this tonight.  Four kids have survived thanks to the inventive genius at Fisher Price.  Not because it saved them.  It saved me.  The company single handedly keeps me from the looney bin.  You know what it’s like.  The screaming.  And if you don’t, then it’s because you either don’t have kids, or your brain has washed away the horrible memories.  PIRD, I call it.  Post Infant Relief Disorder.  Where your brain helps you forget those nights of screaming.  Why is the baby screaming? Oh, for lots of reasons.  Gas.  Teething.  The Grizzlies didn’t make the playoffs.  His favorite dancer got voted off the TV Show.  Rush Limbaugh didn’t move to Puerto Rico.  That’s why.  Not really.  It’s most likely gas.  But hey, in the midst of a screaming fit I like to imagine all the things that my Bug could be screaming about.  It helps. 

Tonight was one of those nights.  Screaming Bug.  Crying Bug.  What-in-the-world-is-wrong-with-him Bug.  My poor little Bug.  Nothing I did helped.  Nothing Clark Kent did helped.  But the sweet Seahorse helped.  Oh, glorious Seahorse of Wonder with your magic tinky music and soft wave and bubble sounds.  Oh how I bow to you.  You. Have. Saved. Us.  Five minutes with the Seahorse of Wonder and Bug was out.  O-U-T.  Sleeping.  Just like that.  And it’s not the only FP toy we have.  Swing, bouncer, jumpy thing, countless toys … all to save my children.  To save them because I don’t go crazy.  It’s the best side kick a mom could want.  Yay Seahorse!  Now excuse me as I go enjoy my quiet with some chocolate.  That’s what moms do.  Celebrate triumphs one piece of chocolate (or glass of wine) at a time. 

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